This might be a "Vaguebook" type post but it is a thought that hit me today and it was all I could do not to stop and cry.
How did "to" become "away".
In the last 4 months or so my life went from being all about the moments and journeys to time management and destinations. There are stretches of my travels via bicycle that I have all but come to hate. The reason is they have changed in their purpose and or meaning. One of these routes is about 1.5 miles long, if that.
I won't bore you with points A and B because you might be able to pick up on it if you pay attention. Plus, like I said this is a vaguebook style post; pointing out the obvious would make that statement null and void. So on with what I was talking about before I saw shiny and digressed like a man that has used way too many mind altering substances.
This segment that I was speaking of used to be the route I rode to get "to" a weekly moment of fun. I would ride it daily and certain markers along the way made me happy because they were tick marks and obstacles that marked how long until I was at the place I would have a "moment" of fun. When they were tackled in reverse they were even better because they meant my return to the origin of my trip and peace and relaxation, love and cuddles, breakfast burritos and laughs. I didn't realize that until today.
Today I realized why that section of road traveled aggravated me lately. Now I ride "to" what used to be the point of origin. I have a set amount of time to get it done and what I came to do daily. It bums me out. What used to be a flight to fun and a return to happiness is now a trip to regret and painful departure from what once was. It will change one day hopefully. Now it just sucks the life out of my legs and ways heavy on my heart. It is really hard to pedal when you hold back lakes of tears and just want to sit down and give up.
